tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1055932257464975902.post301488528102735224..comments2024-03-10T23:01:51.493-05:00Comments on Stupid Motivational Tricks / Bemsha Swing: Here's a bad poem Jonathanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09371893596402673898noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1055932257464975902.post-4662855826420764262016-09-14T11:33:17.767-05:002016-09-14T11:33:17.767-05:00Yes, they are metrical, technically, but it is as ...Yes, they are metrical, technically, but it is as if he thought he could just count to 11. They have no backbone. It is "prose verse" so to speak. That oratorical style. We discussed this when we were looking at Jill's book Poetry Beyond the Page. I had mentioned this to them before as an example of bad poetry, and they wanted to see it. I sense another book of bad poetry waitingJonathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09371893596402673898noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1055932257464975902.post-43400823236108161142016-09-14T11:29:01.871-05:002016-09-14T11:29:01.871-05:00Also, y esto creo es importante: he is trying to m...Also, y esto creo es importante: he is trying to make it work as poem by using endecasílabos. But they are about the laziest endecasílabos I have ever seen. I think I have just had some key intuition about endecasílabos generally, or understood something about them. Now want to levantar a bibliografía on themLeslie B.https://www.blogger.com/profile/10020364290777579994noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1055932257464975902.post-54498959098536769572016-09-13T23:49:42.606-05:002016-09-13T23:49:42.606-05:00First strophe is more siglo de oro-ish because of ...First strophe is more siglo de oro-ish because of that rhyme & some things with syntax and enjambement ... then he goes more Romantic for the rest of the poem. It is as though he had just spit it out, going with what was easy.<br /><br />Today in class I was using anonymized essays of students to show what I was considering good-enough quality for this level of class. I was using one as an Leslie B.https://www.blogger.com/profile/10020364290777579994noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1055932257464975902.post-35702214571893633902016-09-13T09:52:34.369-05:002016-09-13T09:52:34.369-05:00I don't know why he uses the consonant rhyme -...I don't know why he uses the consonant rhyme -anto at the beginning then switches to the a-a assonance in the rest of the poem. All the lines scan but it's as though he could do that in his sleep. Jonathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09371893596402673898noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1055932257464975902.post-53113938552278803082016-09-13T08:55:20.548-05:002016-09-13T08:55:20.548-05:00It's bad, yet is a poem (so, bad poem) and gos...It's bad, yet is a poem (so, bad poem) and gosh you really can hear that Neruda voice. Also, PN keeps using a certain vocabulary, rhythm, and similar rhymes throughout his career. If he were an intermediate Spanish student I would say he needed to stretch, vary his style and cadences, and build his vocabulary.Leslie B.https://www.blogger.com/profile/10020364290777579994noreply@blogger.com