I'm in pretty good shape now. I have been working out at the gym, meditating, getting massages. I even went to a yoga class over the weekend. I have a good psychotherapist. I rode my bike to school today.
My work is going well. I am writing every day and am being nominated for honors and awards. My colleagues respect me. I have the best conceivable job in the world: teaching Spanish literature. They pay me for this? You've got to be fucking kidding me. That 's like Norm, from the old "Cheers' sitcom, being paid to taste beer all day.
I am financially secure with no debts. I can recite Shakespeare and Lorca from memory at great length in order to impress women. I am charming, witty, and good-looking. I am at the height of my intellectual powers, in the prime of my life.
I come from a very loving and nurturing family, full of brilliant people. I have many friends in the town where I live who hold me in high esteem. Brilliant, wonderful people.
Aside from some personal difficulties that persist, and that I cannot talk about yet in public, I am doing extraordinarily well. Just thought you ought to know that my project for restoring some balance to my life is proceeding very nicely. I feel tremendously grateful to everyone who has been kind to me, and also feel generous to anyone who would like my advice and guidance.
I know that it would be much cooler to be plaintive and self-deprecating, but I just don't feel like that today.