It sounds a bit corny, but an idea to turn off the radio voice is to write down a list of things you like about yourself. The first thing I wrote down was
"I am committed to personal growth."
Once I had written that down, I knew I was on to something. If you look at it, that statement is perfect. It is confident and optimistic, but it is not like saying "I am smart and good-looking." It acknowledges any weaknesses that might be there, implicitly.
Then I wrote:
", and I have already made progress; I have shown that this growth is possible, and I am not done yet."
Then I wrote some more things. Some more specific and others equally general. I tended not to write things like "I am a good writer." I think I am comfortable with listing things I am good at, but those things don't tend to dig as deep. I could easily discount a thing like "I can make a good omelet," because it doesn't seem as powerful a statement as "I am committed to personal growth." Lots of folks can fry an egg, after all, but how many are as truly committed to personal, intellectual, and musical growth as I am?
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But if you want to start off with just things you are good at, that's fine too.
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I have a friend, not a close friend yet but a relatively new acquaintance and part of my larger circle of friends. He is relatively young, tall, good-looking, and personable; he's read a lot of poetry and is very bright. He is smart and easy to talk with, etc... I was thinking, yeah, he's a great guy, it would seem, involved with his children's activities and someone most people would like.
Then the next thought was that I am all these things too (aside from tall and young!). So I sometimes use that as a device to ease up the pressure on myself. Why should I be harder on myself than I would be on my acquaintance?
9 comments:
OK, the first things I thought of:
1/ I am happy. I am truly fascinated with the world, and so very pleased to be able to see and interact with it. This intense interest in things in general inspires others. They can hardly believe it, but they discover they can almost fly.
2/ I listen closely with and with intense interest to what other people say.
3/ My sense of aesthetics and design is unparalleled -- well, perhaps it is paralleled or superseded, but it is nonetheless very good and it gives me and others a great deal of pleasure.
4/ I have a strong mind. I can think things through and follow through, to implications and action. The feeling of bringing a strong mind into focus and then setting it to unravel a problem is not an opportunity everyone gets, and I am glad to have the opportunity to do it.
5/ I am not moralistic or judgmental.
Excellent!
***this is indeed a really interesting exercise***
I can't spend any time at all around people who aren't into personal growth. I feel like it kills my brain to be around stagnation.
- I am courteous.
- I can edit.
- I have some very difficult friends.
I hope I am easier than some of your other friends.
Jonathan, You have always been a happy hayride. ;)
Addendum: A lot of what I like about myself falls under the "I can edit" heading, including that point about "difficult friends." I think what I like the *best* about myself, outside of my unswervable devotion to my son and my partner and her family, is my ability to pull out great new work from "my" authors and artists. Clarissa, I think I am more interested in their personal growth than mine!
Hellping others with personal growth is great. I try to be a mentor too, but often don't have many takers.
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